Louvre This For Nathan

So. I am a huge fan of gift shops and souvenirs. Souvenirs for me, souvenirs for my work friends, souvenirs for family, souvenirs for that one maintenance guy at my apartment who is good at his job, souvenirs for your uncle. I like to support the local economy, what can I say?

Some people are easy to souvenir shop for. My mom is going to want magnets. Most people are cool with a magnet. Side note: I'm not most people. Do not get me a magnet. I want magnets of places I have been, not places you have been.

My brother is...actually I am not sure what he would genuinely want but this was Europe so I just got him church-related memorabilia. My other brother said he wanted those rubber bands that I blame Lance Armstrong for. So boy did I oblige.

But some people are difficult to souvenir shop for. Like Nathan for instance. The love of a toddler can be purchased, and it's surprisingly cheap. The issue is that I'm not sure I can make a Venn diagram of the things Nathan would like and the things he should have. He would like weapons. He should NOT have weapons. He already weaponizes everyday objects. I did love the idea of getting him a Swiss army knife in Switzerland but I think we all know which end of the knife I would be on.

So I found this little plastic camera in the Louvre gift shop where I was already dropping mad euros. I wasn't quite sure what it was, so I waited for a youth to pick one up and from observing him I gathered that it was a View-Master situation. Which was dope. I clicked through a few images and it joined the group of souvenirs I was liberating from Paris.

Later that night as I reviewed the #haul, Emily wanted to see what I got in the Louvre. She had dipped out early because she can't hang when I souvenir shop. I showed her le View-Master and she asked who it was for. When I told her I thought it would be a good souvenir for Nathan (I had already bought 3 things for his in utero sister), she asked if I had looked at all the slides.

I hadn't, but it wouldn't take long. There were 14 total pictures. Mostly Renaissance paintings and sculptures. What I had not taken into account is that Renaissance is French for artistic nudity. And while it would be great to go ahead and expose Nathan to the Mona Lisa and the Winged Victory of Samothrace, I think we need to give him a few years before Gabrielle d'Estrees and One of Her Sisters. Trust me.

So that is the story of how I accidentally bought an X-rated souvenir for my 3-year-old nephew. Oops?